It’s December 5, and the pressure is on. The Christmas decorations were out at Costco the second Halloween was over, and holiday music has been blaring in stores for weeks already. We’re bombarded with ads featuring rosy-cheeked children opening lavishly wrapped presents in delight, agreeable, loving families gathered round a gorgeously set table staring in wonder at a breathtaking roast bird that probably cost $300 in today’s market, and starry-eyed couples in exquisite cashmere sweaters cuddling by a picture-perfect fireplace.

Is it any wonder this time of year leaves many feeling inadequate and pressured to get everything just so? Why is it that the happiness of our entire extended family seems to hinge on one perfect meal? And who can afford presents this year, anyways?!

These are all questions I’ve been pondering as we head into the season.

My favourite Christmas movie of all time is National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, with the incomparable Chevy Chase. I’ve been watching it every year since I was sixteen, and it epitomizes the unrealistic expectations and overwhelm that REALLY characterize the holidays. In it, Clark Griswold, a soft-hearted forty-something father of two, dreams of recreating the magical Christmases of his childhood memories, and invites the whole family over for a “good, old-fashioned family Christmas.” But his rosy vision quickly butts heads with reality, in all its messy glory. Everything goes wrong: the in-laws are insufferable; the tree catches fire; the iconic turkey is drier than the Mojave desert in July. In despair, Clark turns to his father and asks him how HE got through the holidays back in the day.

His answer: “I had a lot of help from Jack Daniels.” Ha. So did I.

But you know what? After my first sober Christmas, I realized that the booze just added to the overwhelm! And the exhaustion. I would invariably end up hungover for an entire week, ringing in the New Year (don’t get me started on that most special of special days!) bleary-eyed, feeling and looking like the Walking Dead.

So, if you’re heading into your first holiday season as a newly minted Sober Hero and are apprehensive, know that you can definitely have your alcohol-free eggnog and enjoy it, too! In fact, you’re more likely to enjoy it. Why?

You will be more present, for your family, but also for yourself.

You will have more energy.

You will have more patience.

You will be less likely to be triggered by the fam and revert to your teenage self.

You will eat less – alcohol is well known for giving you the munchies – and thus look and feel better.

You will sleep like an angel and wake up refreshed and rejuvenated.

And most of all, you will feel proud of yourself. This is a hard and courageous thing you’re doing; sobriety is an act of rebellion in this booze-centric society. 

If you’re looking for some ideas to help you navigate the festive season, check out my tips for sober outings here, or my guide to dealing with cravings. And remember: breathe, smile, and have fun!